Listen to your favorite Christian speakers, authors, and pastors including Dr. The Bible, however, without ignoring the importance of romance, puts great emphasis on marriage as is the premier internet provider of online streaming Christian radio broadcasts and programs. In tribal societies, romance doesn't matter as much as social status, and in individualistic Western societies, romance and great sex matter far more than anything else. But in today's society, with its emphasis on romance and sex, it is just as radical to insist that your spouse should be your best friend, though for a different reason. Proverbs 2:17 speaks of one's spouse as your "'allup," a unique word that the lexicons define as your "special confidant" or "best friend." In an age where women were often seen as the husband's property, and marriages were mainly business deals and transactions seeking to increase the family's social status and security, it was startling for the Bible to describe a spouse in this way. “When God brought the first man his spouse, he brought him not just a lover but the friend his heart had been seeking. That is because at the heart of the Biblical idea of marriage is the covenant.” But the Bible sees GOD as the supreme good - not the individual or the family - and that gives us a view of marriage that intimately unites feelings AND duty, passion AND promise. By contrast, contemporary Western societies make the individual's happiness the ultimate value, and so marriage becomes primarily an experience of romantic fulfillment. Traditional societies made the family the ultimate value in life, and so marriage was a mere transaction that helped your family's interest. It is possible to see marriage as merely a social transaction, a way of doing your duty to family, tribe and society. But in talking this way, there is a danger of falling into the opposite error that characterized many ancient and traditional societies. That means that love is more fundamentally action than emotion. “In sharp contrast with our culture, the Bible teaches that the essence of marriage is a sacrificial commitment to the good of the other. The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God A woman 'lets herself go' or a man loses his job, and the compatibility foundation falls apart.” When people think they have found compatibility based on these things, they often make the painful discovery that they have built their relationship on unstable ground. And socio-economic status unfortunately can change almost overnight. Physical attractiveness will wane, no matter how hard you work to delay its departure. The problem with these factors is that they are not durable. If you think of marriage largely as a way to move into the kind of social status in life you desire, then compatibility means being part of the desired social class, and perhaps common tastes and aspirations for lifestyle. If you think of marriage largely in terms of erotic love, then compatibility means sexual chemistry and appeal. “This principle - that your spouse should be capable of becoming your best friend - is a game changer when you address the question of compatibility in a prospective spouse.
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